Apparently, Craigslist attracts the crazies (who knew?).
Hi Charlie! I know where you live, and I have your number, but your wife won't let you talk to anyone. All I can say about that is "Charlie? Pre-nup, okay Charlie? Pre-nup."
I just wanted to let you know that you're a really awesome, totally special dude, and a lot of people miss you and your special sense of humor and friendship and enjoyment of life (as the French say, "joie de vivre.") We miss you Funk!
The next time you're feeling down, please sing this to the tune of "You Are Not Alone"
"YOU ARE NOT ALONE, ALIENS ARE HERE WITH YOU, Charlie"
I also am writing this to let you know that nobody can WHIP IT, WHIP IT GOOD! ("it" meaning a door and by "whip" I mean strike with a belt) like you. Did you finally find the belt of a lifetime?
Come over and see my baby! She plays hide and seek and growls in a beast voice! Ok, ok, I am good guy. I hope your woman doesn't send me hatemail.
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