Thursday, April 15, 2010

Thursday News Roundup: 10 Great Guy Movies A Gal Can Earn Serious Points For Loving

The Frisky has some awesome advice on how to score your next boyfriend: fake an interest in male-oriented movies!

This is almost as brilliant as pretending to like sports, except better because you get high school intern writer Kelli Bender’s insightful analysis into movies that are actually awesome and not specifically targeted at either gender.

The Big Lebowski? Lets guys vicariously live their ultimate fantasy (becoming The Dude, not driving a fancy car, banging hot women, or, oh, anything else that most guys fantasize about) “while also delivering a naked Julianne Moore [and] ball jokes!” Oh—and don’t forget the “dynamite dialogue” (notice the alliteration???)!

The Godfather? “You are risking social scorn is [sic] you go on with life having not [sic-ish] seen it.” Why? “It is an important and excellent film that also features Diane Keaton looking young and fabulous.”

Goodfellas? “As with most Martin Scorsese movies, there is also an awesome soundtrack.” But the best part of the movie? “It is also amusing to see that even crime overlords can get put in their place by their wives.”

Field of Dreams? The film also shows men that no matter how old they get, or how lost they feel, extraordinary things can still happen.” Ms. Bender then goes on to refer to Field of Dreams as a “film” and urges you to watch your movie with your guy (wait, wasn’t this supposed to help you meet guys?) , because it might give you the chance to see him cry! (Sexy!)

The Usual Suspects? “It is a man-powered mystery full of suspense, swear words, and scheming.” And you’ll like it because, “It also has Kevin Spacey doing what he does best—being an amazing actor/human being.”

Ms. Bender’s skill as a film critic aside, this is actually a horrible way to meet guys. That’s because most straight guys are actually looking to date girls, not guys.

If a guy wanted to date someone who locked himself in his room for March Madness, drank beer, and enjoyed a good fart joke, he’d date one of his guy friends. After all, a girl pretending to like all these things is just a watered-down version of an actual male.

We’ve talked about this before: guys are better than we are at separating friendship from sexual desire.So if you buy season tickets to The Nationals, he might think you’re the coolest girl he’s met, but you’re still going to be his coolest girl (space) friend.

If a guy finds a girl who behaves exactly like a guy, he’s going to treat her like a guy. He’ll befriend her, but he won’t necessarily try to sleep with her.

Besides, when you spend too much time pretending to be something you’re not (i.e., a sports/guy-movie fanatic), you ooze self-consciousness, and guys are more attracted to girls that are confident and secure in who they are. Yes, that sounds like cheesy advice your mom gave you when you told her 16 was too old to still be carrying a pink lunchbox to school, but it’s also true.

When you act like the real you isn’t worth showing, people can pick up on that. And they assume that the real you isn’t worth knowing. But when a guy sees a girl walk into the bar with a pink lunchbox like she owns the place, he unconsciously picks up on her body language, which tells his brain, “This girl is HOT!”

So if you want to attract a guy, tell him that you think Field of Dreams is about male athletes’ latent homosexual desires.

OK, maybe don’t take it that far, but you get the point.


  1. Wow. I haven't dated a single woman who's seen (never mind liked) "Goodfellas" but if there was such a creature, I would surely like to meet her and reproduce.

  2. Well said. No point in faking it.

    Doesn't mean you can't watch any movie. Any one at all.

  3. "Oh—and don’t forget the “dynamite dialogue” (notice the illiteration???)!"

    I think you mean alliteration.

  4. I think it's a compromise. Women should watch Goodfellas because you forced me to watch The Notebook last weekend and I did. Essentially the advice was for women to do the same thing men have been doing for decades - suffer for a few hours because if you do what they want, you're more likely to get some.